♥ woolloomooloo sky ♥

ever felt like you never gotten enough sleep or rest day after day, week after week and eventually feeling mentally drained?  that is when your mind and body is crying for help and asking you to take a break for yourself.  you have to.  but i didn’t.  i started feeling extremely tired about two months ago, at times even feeling almost feverish, but i was not sick, …yet.  not until i woke up one day about a month ago, with a fever, feeling dizzy, having a massive headache, muscle ache, nauseated, a sore throat (i wasn’t even coughing yet the day before), cold sweats, chills, short of breath, and barely any voice at all.  it was so sudden, and with all the H1N1 swine flu going around, i was really concerned.  i forced myself out of the bed and tried to make a doctor’s appointment.  the earliest available was the next day, so i just drank lotsa water, took tynenol, and just curled up under my duvet and slept.

the next day when i was at the doctor’s office, as usual the nurse brought my medical chart, checked my blood pressure, weight, temperature, etc.  i couldn’t even talk, so i handed to her a list of the conditions i was having/feeling on a piece of paper i had handwritten it that morning (i remember i was so dizzy and just grabbed a printed notice our association left at the door, and i wrote on the other side of the paper :p)  the nurse read it carefully, clipped it to my chart and handed to the doctor.  she was really nice and attentive, bringing me water when i was coughing a storm.  the first thing my doctor said to me after walking into the room was, “how are you today?”  i looked up and greeted him with barely audible voice, and he said, “oh, feeling miserable huh?”  after examining me and referencing upon my notes, he was concerned and asked if i was around anyone who had H1N1 or in crowded places recently.  yes, i had been…always…at the theater,  shows/exhibitions, events, concerts, conventions, conferences, seminars, etc… he wanted to get me tested for H1N1 immediately.  the nurse came in with a cotton swap to take sample of my mucus through my nostrils and told me we would know the result in ten minutes.  those 600 seconds they left me coughing alone behind closed-door felt like 600 minutes at that moment.  :p  finally the door opened…it was definitely a huge relief when my doctor delivered to me the result that was negative.  i was so thankful for the great news.  he wrote me a prescription for a course of antibiotics, an extra strength cough suppressant, and i should continue with tynenol for my fever and muscle ache.  i was ordered to stay home and not be around crowd until i’m fully recovered.  it was such a bummer to be this sick at the wrong time, as i was really looking forward to go to amy sol‘s opening at copra gallery (formerly known as copra nason gallery), and to drop by the 5th anniversary opening at gallery nucleus that saturday evening.  but i must admit, it gave me an excuse to let myself rest and able to sleep and sleep and sleep.  i was literally home for the first two weeks, only to get out of the house to walk my dog, and i was/am so grateful and appreciative that my friend took the time to bring me food over the weekends that could last me throughout the week.  my appetite was pretty unstable during this time.  apart from the illness, i was also experiencing the full side effects of my medications…they made me extremely dizzy and nauseous.  there were food i’ve always liked that suddenly made me feel even more nauseated just by looking/smelling them.  other food that i don’t usually crave for, i was gastronomically tempted to devour in.  it was a weird experience, and my mom teased that it was like being pregnant. :p  when all my medicines were finished, i was still coughing a storm all day and especially during the night.  i started taking some over the counter cough suppressant for another week and patiently waiting for the side effects to go away.  so, after about a month now, i’m so happy and grateful to start feeling ‘almost healthy’ again this week.  during this time, resting (mostly sleeping a.l.o.t.), it gave me some quiet time to think…about all sort of things.  having lived away from home so many years, i’ve always been pretty independent, but somehow i started physically missing home (which is rare for me…to feel homesick).  i was missing all the home cooked meals and being pampered and taken care of.  anyway, so much to catch up on now that i’ve just prioritized my endless to-do list to get re-organized.  i also just realized it’s thanksgiving week when someone at the grocery store said to me “have a nice holiday” couple days ago!  see how much i was out of touch with time and missing out a whole month of events and information. :p  with this coughing, i should still avoid being around crowds, so i’m sad that i can’t volunteer at the “thanksgiving dinner in the park” this year.  it’s gonna be a quiet little thanksgiving for me.  hm, i wonder if we’re gonna skip the turkey altogether tomorrow. :p

have a wonderful thanksgiving, everyone!  please remember to give thanks, and pray for those less fortunate than we are.  i’ve said it so many times, but i do strongly believe that life is about loving and giving.  and with all the seasonal flu and the H1N1 going around, please pay extra attention to your own body, listen to what it has to say to you, watch out for signs, take good care of yourself and always make time to give yourself a mental and physical break whenever you can.  life is short, live well, stay happy and healthy.  xoxo :)